You gotta know when to hold ’em
Know when to Fold ’em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run…
Kenny Rogers – The Gambler
Too right Kenny! Case in point: putting up the hem on my new super-comfy harem pants. Once a piece of cake for a former home dressmaker and craftsperson. Until Macular Degeneration. Until Parkinsons.
After all it was just two little hems. First mistake! First thread your needle. My needles are big ones with big eyes but even so, no matter where I aimed the thread it didnt go in the hole! Plus it was navy thread. Usually, holding the eye of the needle against the finger tip shows where to put the thread. Somewhere safe is a tiny little gadget you poke through the eye (needle, not you), then put ther thread into that and pull it through. Simples. It was also going to require at least four lengths of thread per hem. About 15 minutes later we were in business and as I have done so many hems over the years I could do it with my eyes closed, which came in handy. After 20cm it was becoming very tedious, but there was no going back. My left hand didnt want to co-operate. It was getting very frustrating.
I took a good look at the hem, got out the tape measure. 65 cm. Times two. Bloomin ‘eck it would take me all day. Of course my helper could do them tomorrow but we only have two hours and we have shopping to do, plus part of a secret project I will tell you about later.
So I had a lightbulb moment and did what bachelors do in a hem emergency – got out the craft glue. Yes that is a sexist statement. My blog.
So that took five minutes. This craft glue sticks to anything it touches, including me, so removing it from my fingers will keep me occupied for the afternoon.
I was still sniffing the glue fumes quite happily when the nice young man from Electrodry arrived to shampoo the carpets. That is strong glue, he asserted, before wheeling me on my office chair into the kitchen out of the way, next to the fridge and pantry. Bad move.
Which is why you are getting this gripping adventure. It is full sun on the patio as yet so too much uv to sit out there.
I hope you have been glued to this gripping tale, or I have come unstuck.
The freshly cleaned and sanitised carpets take an hour to dry, so I may as well go and catch up on my sleep. I was up early putting things up out of the way. All this excitement!